Recently, I was delighted to come across an offering of one of your finest works of art on CraigsList. It may pain you to know that I received it for free, but I think they say that none of the great artists were truly appreciated until they were dead. It is my sincere hope that you are still alive and kicking it in the ATX.
Why? Because I’d like to meet you. I’d like to shake your hand. And I’d like to ask you why on Earth you did this to a sweet, innocent coffee table.
On top of that, you had to pair Ms. Brit with Kid Rock? Honestly, I don’t even get it. Why Kid Rock? Is it because the two of them obviously should have been a couple at some point? Man, the universe sure dodged a bullet on that one.
Did you just get so bored of this table that you couldn’t even bother to give Kid Rock his ratty hair? Or at the very least finish painting his arm?
Okay, I will admit that the Pabst Blue Ribbon belt buckle is a nice touch. Props to you for that.
Random Artist-Type Person, I’d like to thank you for your creative endeavors. If it wasn’t for you, I never would have gotten this table for free from someone on CraigsList, who got it for free from someone on CraigsList, who got it for free from someone on CraigsList, who got it for free from someone on CraigsList.
This beauty cannot be traced past that, but I know that I am now at least the fifth proud owner of this beautiful table. In fact, this may have been the very first item ever listed on CraigsList.
But you know what? I have taken it upon myself to right your wrong. My husband is absolutely horrified that this table has entered our home, but I keep telling him to trust me on this one. How can it possibly turn out any worse than this?
I hope Kid Rock’s creepy floating head haunts your dreams. I know it does mine.
Love,
Lindsay
P.S. I’m adding this post to the Blissfully Domestic “We are Blissfully Domestic!” Celebration. What do you think June Clever would say about this table?
P.P.S. I’m also adding this post to Beckie’s Roadkill Rescue party over at Infarrantly Creative.
Oh. My.
I love thinking that it is the first ever craigslist item like there is only one fruit cake and it just keeps getting regifted.
Why would anyone even think that way? Only in Austin.
I cannot wait to see what you are going to do with this!!
hahahahahahahahaha! I needed a good laugh this morning.
If you had not included the pictures, I would have thought you were making this up! Keep us posted. Enjoy Sunday ~Natalie
I agree–only in Austin! But I can also see the potential and can't wait to see what you do with it!
I LOVE it – you are hilarious. Can't wait to see what it will become!
This is one of the most hilarious posts I've read along with one of the most horrifying pieces of furniture I've ever had the displeasure of seeing. And poor, poor Miss Britney–I think that's her "first post-nuthouse comeback" body that's painted on there. Oh the indignity!! Gotta dig the crackle finish though. Someone really thought that through…
Whoa now. That is some serious Britney love! My favorite part is the belt buckle, LOL
THIS is so hilarious. I cannot wait to see how marvelous you make Brit and Kid. Seriously, WTF was the orginial artist thinking?! ha.
I can only say one word in response to this: wow.
OK, I think I just threw-up a little in my mouth. I cannot wait to see what you do with this thing!!
{{HUGS}}
Robin
)
Lindsay, it's even more magical than I expected.
I cannot wait to see what you do with this no good, very bad coffee table. I know it will be unrecognizable and fabulous.
LMAO!!! This is gonna keep me giggling all day!!!
Why on Earth would anyone do that to an otherwise awesome table???…WHY??? LOL
I am looking forward to seeing the "after" of poor table, thanks to you it will not suffer any longer! LOL
Haha!! My 7 year old daughter looked with disdain on that table. Too funny!! I wish I could find one like that around here. I could trade out my sister's and surprise her when she came home….. it would be fun to watch her try to explain to her husband!! :0)
Oh wow. That's definitely a doozy! Good luck with that one! -Kelsee
Wow, that really is some table. I can't wait to see how you rescue it. Hugs, Marty
oh the horror!!! that's like a train wreck, you just can't look away, LOL!!!
cant wait to see what you do!
LOL funny, entertaining post!
I WILL have to keep posted to see the transformation of this jewel…kudos to you for seeing its potential, I myself am having a hard time!!!
Janell
I'll give you 50 bucks if you keep it that way for a month until I come visit. I want to bask in its glory!!! : )
The belt buckle sure was nifty.
I can't wait to see what this becomes. Craigslist scares me. I have never. Not once. Been on Craigslist.
Oh wow! This is one ugly table. It has to make you wonder, what on earth were they thinking when they did this to the table? I cant wait to see the transformation.
oh.my.goodness. Truly don't know what to say other than—looking forward to the after.
Oh. my. gosh. Lindsay, this made my day!!! I WANT to know WHO, WHO came up with this concept. Now all I can imagine is Britney and Kid Rock together. Can't wait to see what you do with it. My husband would freak out. This is one for the record books.
My husband wants that table.
That is truly horrifying. I would have left it in the garage until it got a makeover. When I have free time, I browse the Austin CraigsList just for kicks and giggles.
Can you come over and see if you have any suggestions. I am having problems with my follower section and I need advice.
Thanks Cheri
Its So Very Cheri
Uh, Lindsay, that's about as ugly as it gets. Please show us how you "beautify" it. You might have to be nominated for rescuing the wood.
Brenda
LOL – that is one seriously hiddeous table – can't wait to see what you do with it!!!
That's hysterical! Thanks for sharing!
That is so horrifying I sat stunned for a second and then the giggles commenced.
It's so horrifying it's almost too bad you have or will be making it pretty and give it a new life. With that said, you need to have some pictures of it framed and displayed just to keep the conversation going on with it.
What a scream!
Awesome!!!!!! I can't wait to see the transformation!
HAHAHAHA I can't wait to see what you do with it!
OH.MY.GOODNESS!! I live in Cedar Park and regularly stalk the free section of Austin's Craig's List. I ACTUALLY saw that table listed in the past month and couldn't even believe my eyes….and was even more shocked when I saw that it was pending pick up! I about laughed out loud when I read your post!!! I absolutely cannot wait to see what you do with it!!!
FREAKIN' HILARIOUS! (Almost wet my pants!) Can't wait to see what you do with this bee-you-tee! Be sure to post some pics!
Grins and giggles,
Pamm
OMG, please prime over that beast ASAP!!!
Wow. So excited to see what you do with this!
Well… it is a conversation starter!
I can't believe DH let you put that in the living room even to take a picture. It is so much scarier than I thought it would be.
WOW!!! That may be the worst coffee table I've ever seen! I hope you can rescue the poor thing.
Oh my goodness that is terrible! I have never seen anything like it!
I can't wait to see what you make of it!
HAHAHAHAHA! "In fact, this may have been the very first item ever listed on CraigsList." Hilarious. When you're done can I please feature this one on my blog? It's priceless.
check out the craigslist gem I found, on my personal blog here:
http://allenavenue.blogspot.com/2009/08/good-gaudy-oh-please-do-pardon-pun.html
I am pretty sure that will haunt my dreams tonight. Rescue it quickly!
I am laughing so hard I have tears running down my face…thanks for sharing…can't wait to see the transformation!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
Thanks for making me laugh out loud. The half-painted arm is classic.
I can't believe this table is for real! Hysterical! I almost hate for you to paint over Britney and Kid, but at least you have these photos for the memories.
Can't wait to see what you do with it. You're a braver woman than I to tackle it! Ha.
THAT IS AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!
Seriously, that is the craziest thing I have ever seen!
LOVE
ARE YOU KIDDING ME??!! That is unbelievable. I have no words.
Yep, I would say only in Austin would something like that show up on Craigslist. Everywhere else it'd probably just show up on the side of the road during big trash pickup. (I live in San Antonio, by the way) Stopping by to give you some commentin' kudos, I guess that's what it's called. Hope you'll visit me too! Funny post by the way.
Anna
Funniest. Coffee table. Ever!
Okay, I found you through Kimba's DIY day, and I've been going through your archives–and this is absolutely HILARIOUS! You are too funny. Can't wait to see how Brit and Kid are transformed.
I think I got my ab workout this morning due to reading this post. Thanks for sharing it!