You have heard it said that prior preparation prevents poor performance. This is true for a lot of things with a few caveats. The prior preparation also has to be proper preparation. It is similar to another axiom: Practice makes perfect. In truth, practice makes permanent. Perfect practice makes perfect. If you practice the wrong thing, you will commit the wrong thing to muscle memory and it will be very hard to fix it later. What I am trying to say is that it is not just important that you prepare for big life events, but that you prepare correctly.
This does not mean there are no exceptions. Some people are better when speaking extemporaneously than they are after hours of practice. Some people are funnier when on the spot and the life of the party than they are if they try to write out a joke and practice it in front of a mirror. But in general, avoiding proper preparation is the recipe for disaster. While no one can foresee the future, there is a certain amount of predictability baked into the equation of life. Even if you cannot prepare for every eventuality, you can prepare for the big ones. Here are a few where good preparation can make all the difference:
Midlife
Both men and women go through a midlife crisis in one way or another. That crisis has both a psychological and a physical component. A woman’s body goes through changes that are hard to explain and impossible to understand if you are not a woman who has already been there. You will think there is something wrong with you when everything is functioning exactly as it should.
That doesn’t mean you should just put up with it without a fight. You can get effective hot flash relief without a prescription or side effects. Hot flashes are especially pernicious because they come without warning and are not associated with any external stimuli. In a house full of people with the air conditioner on, you are burning up. You ask if it is hot in here or is it just you. It is almost always just you.
That hardly seems fair. Your body tries to compensate by gushing streams of putrid sweat. Thanks, but no thanks. You should be prepared for all the symptoms that are about to be unleashed so that you realize there is nothing out of the ordinary going on. If you are approaching 40, it is time to start doing your homework concerning the changes you are about to undergo.
Your Child’s First Move
By the time you are an adult, you have moved a number of times in your lifetime. You know exactly what to expect. While moving is never fun, it is usually predictable. And you know you will get over the mile trauma it causes.
That said, your child will take it a lot harder. They need to be emotionally prepared for moving house. In school, children learn how to make friends. What they don’t learn is how to lose friends all of a sudden. That is what moving is to them. This sometimes causes real trauma. As a parent, you have to be sensitive to the fact that the house and neighborhood, and school that makes up your child’s entire world are being stripped away without as much as a conversation or warning. Be fair to everyone affected by the process and prepare your kids emotionally for what is about to happen. Make sure you provide them whatever support they need, be it packing their stuff and hiring movers in New York City or supporting them emotionally.
Off to College
There is a lot to do before your child can be ready to go off to college. One of the first things to do is separate the facts from the myths about college. The cost is not the only consideration. Your child needs to be learning how to make good decisions when no one is looking. You also have to learn how to start letting go and trusting your child with ever increasing bits of responsibility along the way. Don’t let college be the first time he leaves home and is away from your direct supervision. There are many preparatory steps you can take along the way. Take advantage of as many as possible.
Life throws a lot at us without providing a handbook to study for the final. That said, you will be able to navigate it just fine when you prepare for the most common pitfalls such as midlife, your child’s first move, and sending your child to college.
