Finding the love of your life and getting married is a dream come true. However, many women realize soon after that their husbands are a package deal. Behind many loving husbands are a loving and doting mother – who you may or may not get along with.
In order to build a strong relationship with your husband, you’ll also need to form a bond with his parents. Not only will a healthy relationship with your inlaws strengthen your marriage with your husband, but it will give you less of a headache overall.
As far as in-laws go, mothers can be a little harder to break. In order to be accepted by her, it often takes a certain approach. If you want to get on your mother in law’s good side, here are some of the best tips.
Accept Her Help
Often the reason for clashing between women and their husband’s mothers is that they feel they’re overstepping their boundaries. Perhaps you want to hire a nanny, but she insists she should move in and do the childcare.
Rather than seeing this as an irritation, try to change your perspective. Allowing her to be of assistance can give her a sense of meaning and connection with your family. If her living with you is too much, try to find a balance that works for both of you. Perhaps she can watch your baby during the daytime hours and you hire a babysitter if you need childcare at night.
Regardless of how comfortable you may be feeling with your mother in law, it’s important to remain polite. Remember, she’s from a different generation than you and may have a different set of values.
Try to keep your calm and bite your tongue when you feel like snapping. The more that you exercise your good manners, the more it will encourage her to do the same.
Spend Time Together
Try to take some time to get to know who she is as a person. Show some interest in her life and propose doing things together. You may not have everything in common, but with enough effort, you may find that you have more in common than you think.
Not only will spending more time one on one together make it easier on you, but it will also give your husband a sense of relief too.
One of the golden rules of being a polite guest is always offering a helping hand. If you go to your mother in law’s home, be sure to offer help. Even if she says no, it’s essential to insist.
Whether it’s cleaning or helping set the table, it’s the gesture that counts.